Episode 35: "Still Game"

Has anyone told you lately that we live in strange times?

Joking. Of course someone has. People have been telling each other that since March of 2020, back when we still had the energy to use the word “unprecedented.” “These are unprecedented times,” said the slick senator to the journalist. “These are unprecedented times,” said the CEO to the scared staff. “These are unprecedented times,” said the worthless president to the camera. It’s no wonder so many of us don’t trust politicians — they talk to us like we’re a buncha pre-schoolers who just asked the teacher where babies come from. Spare us the storks, please — it’s been a long couple a years. Tell us the truth. Just say, “Trump’s a liar! It’s nothing like the flu! Go home and stay there until we can beat this bastard!”

For awhile it looked like Joe Biden would talk to us like that. We smiled at every “MALARKEY” and cheered when he called Trump a “clown.” Also, there was this. Where were you when you first saw this?

Okay, that felt a little difficult to watch. Who let these old guys stand in a room under those hot lights? Someone get them chairs! Someone get them water! Jeez, can they at least be given walking sticks for when they finally leave the stage? Yikes. Maybe being old and outspoken is a younger man’s game.

Welcome to our episode on Still Game, a show where everyone helps each other and no one ever takes any shite. Throw on an episode of this Scottish sitcom and be transported to a place where Covid-hoarders would be chased out of town and anti-maskers would be locked in their flats. The local cheapskate would be first in line for a free vaccine and the town gossip would be leading sewing circles via Zoom. No one would lose their healthcare, no one would lose their home, and no matter how crazy the day was going, there would always be time for a pint.

Jack and Victor 2024, ya pricks.